Comments About Reality Check

Thanks so much for Monday's (April 14th) column.
You know sometimes it is just okay to be a stay at home mom but most of the time we need a little encouragement!  Sometimes I can get myself down by thinking that I need to do it all:  Stay at home daily with my children planning all these things to do, have a spotless home; and of course fix that irrisistable dinner that everyone will love!  Well I have come to understand that this expectation is impossible all of the time and there is nothing wrong with getting out of the house with other children or adults.  In fact, it is essential!!!

Your article helped me realize that we need to get out and see the world with our children and not that this has to be the norm but it does help!
Karyn

I really enjoy reading your columns. They always bring a smile to my face, and I often find myself shaking my head in agreement with your thoughts. Keep those stories coming!!
Lorrie 

I just wanted to let you know I enjoy your columns in the Belleville Intelligencer very much. I read it every week, but have never taken the time to check your website.  I really appreciate your sense of humour; I feel that is one of the most important aspects of my relationship with my husband - and certainly helps with my 3-year-old & newborn!  Thanks for sharing your experiences, it's nice to know others have home lives as crazy as mine (and I wouldn't have it any other way)
Brigette

Hi,Sheila. I just had to write to let you know how very much I enjoy your column. Your stories are so down to earth and relatable. Your style reminds me of Erma Bombeck, a writer I truly admired. My daughter doesn't subscribe to the Intel, so I make it a point to cut out your columns and send them to her. As a mother of an active 2 1/2 year old, she relates to the young mother aspect of your articles. Keep up the good work, Sheila. Your efforts are extremely refreshing
Donna 

A little note to tell you how much I enjoy your column. Now my own daughter reads it too!! She has 2 little kids--my grandchildren I am proud to say. Your stories make me laugh and tonight she called to make sure I read the lizard story!! I must say it is the first thing I read each Monday. As I write this I think I will call my Mom and see if she is familiar with you column. In many ways you remind me of Lynn Johnson the cartoonist who also looks at a slice of life. I hope you enjoy writing it as much as we enjoy reading it!!
Sheila 

Now the negative...

On Hallowe'en

I usually read your column every week.  Most of the time it is entertaining as well as thought provoking.  However,  I was not impressed after reading your article about Halloween.  First of all, the part about "getting up the enthusiasm" to spend money on costumes and candy doesn't go over well considering that most of your readers are aware that your husband is a pediatrician!  Give me a break!  I bet there are lots of people out there on fixed incomes who are happy to spend a little money so that their children can enjoy Halloween.

Secondly, I was kind of surprised by the main theme of your article.  You seem like a dedicated mother who wants the best for her kids.  However, you complain several times about the effort involved in Halloween.  Last time I checked, Halloween was for kids, not adults.  When you have kids, it isn't always about you anymore.  Its about making that extra effort so the kids have fun.  Thats was Halloween is about.  Fun and nothing else. 

Unfortunately, children must learn early in life that the world is full of bad people just waiting to harm them.  I don't think the rules get changed on Halloween.  Children don't go out alone (we hope).  Most parents check the candy over.  There are volunteers out on the roads to make sure the kids are safe.  And for the most part, nothing bad usually happens.  If it did, Halloween would get cancelled.
I'm sorry that you didn't enjoy Halloween as a child but I hope you don't ruin it for your kids.  Childhood is too precious.  Let's not let our attitudes spoil it for the kids.

And on spanking...

I had a few negative ones about the "Spare the Rod" column I wrote about how I believe the Children's Aid Society mishandled the case involving spanking in Aylmer. My point in the column was that spanking with a rod, while certainly not advisable and definitely potentially harmful, should not warrant removal from an otherwise loving family. In fact, I stated four times that spanking with a rod was not advisable. 

Nevertheless, the Children's Aid wrote a letter to the editor complaining that I "advocated" this, completely misrepresenting my position. They also never commented on the bulk of my column, which is that parents can do far more harm by ignoring their kids than by spanking them, if they come from a loving family. I found this curious. Have we, as a society, lost our common sense? What do the rest of you think (because I may do a follow up to this one). I'd love your opinions here.